Contra Comfort Colors

By Zach Brown — Opinion Editor |

Let me first offer sincerest congratulations to the newest members of Samford’s Panhellenic organizations. Your fortitude throughout the Recruitment process has paid off.  Now, you can look forward to four glorious years of sisterhood.

And Comfort Colors t-shirts.

Ladies (and formal dates) of Samford, I ask with a humble spirit and a mourning soul, please do not wear these abominable vestments.

While your new organization’s letters or crest may be emblazoned onto the fabric of these soft, perfect-for-that-lazy-Sunday-afternoon shirt, this does not make the shirt any better. When your other t-shirts, blouses, or pants become faded, what do you do? Burn them. With Comfort Colors shirts, the fading is done for you. Why would anyone with any sense of style (and I know you ladies all have keen fashion sense) willingly wear a faded garment?

Down the same line of thinking lies the question of size. Comfort Colors shirts are notoriously oversized and ill-fitting. Ladies, you all have excellent figures. Why would you wear an oversized, ugly shirt that makes you look like a trailer park matron?

To those who say that the comfort factor outweighs the aesthetic atrocity: no amount of plushy fabric can make your test easier or your boy situation any less dramatic.

Women of Samford, you do not need to settle for feeling comfortable in ugly clothing. You are all beautiful. Be comfortable inside your own skin and not inside a big, pastel tent of a shirt.

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